Venice day One. The evil day.

Venice during Carnivale. Seems like a good idea, no? Well, if you like huge crowds, terrible tour guides and nearly being trampled to death then it is the place for you.

I make Venice sound horrible, don't I? Well, if you pronounce it right, Carnival does have the word "evil" in it. And the Venetians agree. Of the untold numbers of people who participate in Carnivale each year, very, very few are locals. Which is interesting because its supposed to be their holiday. Most Venetians are not found celebrating but selling, posing or hiding in their homes. So what did we do? Walk right in the midst of it all.

Lets examine why I disliked Venice so much (I do, however, want to make it clear that this is only on the first day. Even during this I still felt I would like Venice and after the second day, truly did.) How can you dislike a place that looks like this?

The day started off with a five am bus pickup. Mornings and I do not get along. At all. I am super grumpy when I first wake up anyway and five am just isn't happening. The bus ride wasn't too bad, though the breakfast stop was way too crowded. I do not often find myself being suffocated when in pursuit of a croissant but when it happens, I remember.

We finally arrived in Venice! The view from the boat is breathtaking. No one is allowed to drive vehicles in Venice so you can only get there by boat or train, then walk or take a water taxi from there. Energy was high and people were snapping pictures left and right. But mostly left, because that was the direction of the main island. But energy was not the only thing that was high. So was our hunger levels, making lunch our number one priority. Unfortunately, we were expected to take a tour first. Our tour guide couldn't have reached five feet if she jumped which made it hard to keep track of her in the massive crowds. But, no worries. She had a vibrant green umbrella that she thrust into the air like a standard bearer from ancient Rome, trusting that we could follow it as soldiers, battling our way through the endless crowds. (picture = San Marco Square and basillica)

She was a terrible tour guide and we learned nothing besides: people used to eat pigeons but now the crowds are too big for them to be present in the squares. Venice is entirely surrounded by water and sometimes floods. Lots of people wear masks to celebrate Carnivale. She was so smart, she even brought postcards to use as illustrations! Yeah, we ditched the tour and decided to take Venice on our own.

By now we were starving but food was not forthcoming. We eventually found a place that was run by Asians, were forced to sit with another couple (who probably felt trapped by us because there was so little room between the tables and in order for them to get out we would have had to move). I was so excited to eat I almost didn't notice how bad the overpriced food was. I ordered gnocci which was fine but it tasted like they had used a can of generic chef boyardee sauce. Hello? We're in Italy? If you want your food to be that expensive, you'd better work to at least make it seem authentic, honey.

Finally saved from starvation, we moved on. A few of us took a gondola ride but I opted out and returned to exploring the city. My goal for the next few hours was to find a mask and rock it. Tucked away in the corned of a square was a small shop entirely dedicated to Carnivale paraphenelia. It was decently priced, the owners were friendly and they had an excellent selection. For once, Venice was deciding to be nice. But then what do we do? "Let's go walk around a little more and see what else we can find." That was silly. We ended up turning left down a street and into hell. Something (from what we could see, it appeared to be one of the Venetian costumed wonders) was clogging the roadway because people were insisting on stopping and taking pictures, happily oblivious to the pile-up behind them. There was no where to go but forward but nowhere to go forward. For someone who hates crowds, this is not good (small spaces, sure I love 'em. even little crowds are okay. this was not okay). For someone who loves crowds, it was not good. People pushed from behind, trying to get through but all they acheived was the suffocation of the people in front of them. Forget crazy Italian drivers, this was the closest I've ever come to death here. We finally managed to find a side street and escape. Later (after we intelligently returned to the first shop and purchased our masks) we returned to find that the police had blocked off that street and made it one-way. I wonder if someone was trampled?

Maybe I exaggerate a little. I do that sometimes. But the spirit of the thing is entirely accurate.

My wonderful (and creepy) Carnivale mask at dinner. Aren't I lovely? Forget feathers and sparkles, you know me, I need something different.

Dinner that night wasn't much better than lunch but it contained some really good olives and nice, warm, amazing bread. And some on-the-house lemoncello to top it off. Of course, being the evil day, the owner was irritated when we asked to split the check between our credit cards even though he was perfectly cheerful about it for the table ahead of us, who were also a group of American girls. Oh well.

We watched the Olympics to end the night, I tried my first Ferrer Rocher. The Olympic channel delighted me becuase the announcers had british accents, it was an Italian channel and the commercials were in German. Oh Eurosport.

P.S. if you want to know why I love Venice, you'll have to read the next blog.